Insert 9
Xoli
After Nokwazi left things haven’t been the same. Nqoba and I fight a lot
and he has gone back to sleeping with random chicks. Its become so bad
that I told him we need a break. Its been 3 months since she left. I did go
to where our dreams are but all I found was letters for me and her mom.
Inside my letters was rent money and photo scans of the baby. Every
time when I left the place I always felt sad and it broke my heart more
because I thought I would never see my friend again.
Today I woke up feeling a bit out of it; must have been the wine. Its my
day off so I will just clean around the flat and catch up on some sleep. I
haven’t been sleeping well. Been thinking about Nqoba and he has been
shutting me out. So I woke up and had breakfast.
After breakfast I cleaned around the flat and took a shower afterwards
because I had done my laundry the previous night. Just when I was
about to sit down there was a knock on the door. I opened and it was
Nqoba. He looked horrible.
Me: “ What are you doing here Nqoba?”
Nqoba: “ Can I come in?” he had teary eyes. I made way for him and he
got in. I closed the door and walked to the lounge. I was wearing his tshirt
and socks. He looked at me before sitting down.
Me: “ What do you want Nqobani?” he scratched his head before looking
at me. He had his car keys and phone in his hand.
Nqoba: “ I miss my baby. I miss you” I chuckled.
Me: “ It’s been 2 months. You busy fucking random bitches and now that
you have had enough you just waltz in here telling me you miss me? Get
out of here. Don’t make me laugh”
Nqoba: “ I am sorry Xolile ka Nqobani. I have been going through some
stuff and…”
Me: “ So you thought you’d hurt me by fucking around and come back tell
me that shit? It doesn’t work like that. It’s either you tell me what is
bothering you or just fuck out of here”
Nqoba: “ My mom is sick okay. She is sick and there is nothing anybody
can do right now. She’s holding on for Nqubeko. That’s all.
Me: “ What do you mean she is holding on for Nqubeko?”
Nqoba: “ She is holding on for his wedding” he sighed and knelt in front of
me.
Nqoba: “ I have been stupid. I regret it and I love you. I really love you
Xoli but I am going to need you to tell me where Nokwazi is.” I chuckled
in disbelief.
Me: “ Get out! Get the fuck out of here!” I shouted and stood up to open
the door for him.
Nqoba: “ You need to keep calm. Nqubeko would like to see her one
more time before the wedding”
Me: “ You mean fuck her and leave her like used condoms? Fuck you
Nqobani. Just leave”
Nqoba: “ Stop swearing Xolile” he was getting angry but I wasn’t backing
down either.
Me: “ Leave and go tell that dick brother of yours that he will never find
Xoli” he suddenly got angry and charged for me but he was stopped by
his ringing phone.
Nqoba: “ Bro” he listened and nodded his head after that he placed his
phone in his pocket.
Nqoba: “ Get dressed. You’re coming with me” I looked at him as if he
was crazy.
Me: “ I’m going nowhere with you Nqobani.” He got closer and cupped
my face.
Nqoba: “ Please come with me; after that I will leave you alone. Please
just this one last time” I walked to my bedroom and threw in my jeans
and an over sized hoodie that belongs to Nqoba and my push ins. I got to
the lounge and took my keys and phone.
We left and Nqoba locked the flat. We hurried downstairs and got in his
cars. He drove away in speed. I didn’t even want to ask him where we’re
going. After that reckless driving we finally got to Chief Albert Luthuli
Hospital. We specifically went to the Oncology department.
I walked slower but he pulled me like a child I was just irritated. We got to
this nicely decorated ward. First thing I noticed was a very depressed and
crying Nqubeko but what puzzled me was that his mom was sitting on the
bed reading a book.
I have seen her on the net and news papers but not in person and can I
just say that she is a freakishly gorgeous coloured lady. That is where
these guys get their complexion from. Nqoba was still holding my hand
and we walked towards the bed. She looked up at us and smiled.
Mrs M: “ Aaah you finally decided to bring her with” I was puzzled.
Nqoba: Come one Mom. I told you I’d bring her.” He kissed her cheek
and pulled me to him.
Mrs M: “Get away Quinton. I need to see this beautiful girl right here” she
pushed and he chuckled. He kissed my lips before walking to Nqubeko
leaving me with his mom.
Mrs M: “ Come closer. How are you?” she had the sweetest voice.
Me: “ I’m okay Mrs Msomi. How are you?” she smiled. She had dimples.
Mrs M: “ Call me mom. I am okay given the circumstances.”
Me: “ Do you need anything? Are you comfortable?” she placed her soft
warm hand on top of mine.
Mrs M: “ I’m okay baby. Come sit. I want to talk to you” I sat down with
her holding my hand.
Me: “ I see Nqoba is bringing in the big guns” she laughed.
Mrs M: “ I know my son can be a dick sometimes hell he is a dick but he
loves you. You are all he talks about and I know he hurt you buy I need
you to do something for me” I was now in tears because this woman was
speaking as if she didn’t have much time left.
Me: “ Anything” she smiled and wiped her tears.
Mrs M: “ Take care of him. Take care of my son when I am gone. He is
going to need you. I am sorry for doing this to you and I am sure if your
parents were still alive they wouldn’t allow you to get back together to a
man who has hurt you this much” I nodded and I was now sobbing.
Mrs M: “ Please stay with him. When Nqoba goes through something
tragic he tends to do stupid things but I need you to be strong for him. Be
there for him”
Me: “ You can’t leave yet. Please Nqoba and I just found each other. I just
met you and i..”
Mrs M: “ Shhh. Everything will be okay but I have one more request.” She
wiped my tears.
Me: “ I will do it”
Mrs M: “ Find your friend for me. Nqubeko is going to need her. He might
have made a fool of everyone else but I know my son. Find her. He will
need her. For now let me rest. I want to rest” I just cried and I felt
someone hold me. It was Nqoba. We stayed and spoke for a long time
before we went back to my place. We ordered food and cuddled. That
night Nqoba received a call that his mom had passed on.
Xoli
The following days were hard on Nqoba but Nqubeko was a weeping
mess. I could see that something was eating him but he just buried
himself at work. Nqoba was clingy. I even had to take leave at work
because he always had to have me by his side.
So today is Friday; the day we bring home Nqoba’s mom home. He has
been crying since we woke up and yes; i am over at his parents place.
We have been staying there since the passing of his mother. I not only
have to look after 1 guy no; i have to look after 2 guys. Nqubeko doesn’t
even know if we’re coming or going.
I got up from bed and took a quick but soothing shower and rushed back
to the bedroom. I wore my boob tube maxi tribal dress with a doek and a
cardigan. I wore my nude pumps and took my phone before kissing
Nqoba on his head. He cried till he fell asleep this morning. I am so late; i
was supposed to help start breakfast.
I got to the kitchen and it was only mam Thuli; the helper in the kitchen
with Nqubeko. He looked better. He was drinking coffee whole
concentrating on his phone.
Me: “ Morning” Mah Thuli just smiled and continued with what she was
doing.
Nqubeko: “ Morning” he smiled faintly.
Me: “ How are you holding up?” he nodded.
Nqubeko: “ As expected. I don’t even know what to do with myself
anymore” i went to hug him and we were disturbed.
Nqoba: “ Baby. Come” i turned around and he was pouting. I wanted to
laugh but i held myself. I followed him out and went to the bedroom. As
soon as i closed the door i was attacked with a breath taking kiss. He
pushed me to bed and started taking off my clothes. That’s when i
stopped him.
Me: “ Baby we can’t. We need to start getting things ready for your mom’s
arrival” he had tears in his eyes.
Nqoba: “ Baby please; i need to feel something. I need you baby please”
he let out a sob and it tore my heart.
I kicked off my pumps and took off the dress as the cardigan was long
gone. I was only left with my panties because i wasn’t wearing a bra.
He sat at the edge of the bed and pulled me to him. He placed his head
on my tummy and i held on to him. I kept brushing his head while his
hand went up my thigh. It came in contact with my panties and it stopped.
He moved it aside and his finger sank in. I moaned out loud because i
was already wet. He took on leg and put it on top of the bed Captain
Morgan.
His tongue swept over my nub and i threw my head back. He pulled away
and i looked down to him. He was looking at me with a smirk on his face.
His face changed to this hard look and he tore my panties causing me to
yelp because the material bit my on my skin.
He pushed his hand deep inside causing me to stand on my toes. He
pulled me back down and drew out his finger. He looked at me and
sucked on his cum filled finger. He took my leg and placed it on his
shoulder so fast i stumbled but he held me preventing me from falling.
He inhaled before his tongue swept in my num. He came back licking his
lips making that “mpa” sound. He turned me around and threw me in bed.
He spread my legs wide open before sitting on his legs. His eyes getting
smaller. He shook his head causing me to shudder.
He laid on his tummy and brought me close. My nana was right in front of
him. His tongue dove in but it wasn’t going as hard and fast. He was very
slow like he was French kissing my nana and it felt heavenly. He used his
fingers to separate my folds and his tongue danced on my very hard nub.
It was too much. I wanted to release but he pulled back and looked at
me.
Nqoba: “ Do you know how much i love you?” he dove back in this time
he picked up the pace because his tongue was going in and out of me
fast. I felt myself drawing near but he quickly pulled back and sat on his
legs.
Nqoba: “ I asked you a question my love” i tried getting up but he pushed
me back down.
Me: “ Nqoba please” my knees were shaking. I really needed to release.
He laughed. He took off his sweat pants and he was only left with his
boxers. He got on top of me and his guy was directly to my nana. He then
started dry humping me. I also started moving fast and furiously. I really
needed to cum but he caught on and got off me.
I opened my eyes and looked at him. His boxers had a big wet spot as
evidence of my wet and horniness. I really needed to cum. He got of the
bed and went to his closet leaving me on the bed like a chicken. He came
back and i heard a buzzing sound. When i looked up he was carrying my
mini purple vibrator. Where the hell did he get it from?
He took off his boxers and his guy popped out. I wanted to out my mouth
on him as he looked so yummy and tasty so i went on all fours and took
him in my mouth without using my hands. He pushed me back and also
got in bed kneeling. I continued giving him a messy but awesome deep
throat because i could hear it in his groans that i was doing a good job. I
felt the vibrator make an entrance in my nana and i jumped.
That gave him an opportunity to flip me over. It was so fast i didn’t even
have time to react as i felt him inside me. His guy was twitching inside me
and i instantly came. I screamed so loud he took a pillow and covered my
face. After that ground shaking orgasm he started again. It was as if i
fuelled him because he started moving hard and fast placing the vibrator
on my nub. I lost all my senses. I was speaking in tongues even i didn’t
understand what i was saying.
I felt the next wave coming and it hit me hard like a ton of brick and he
wasn’t far behind. We were both shaking and moving still. I don’t even
know where the vibrator went but it was no longer there. We continues to
twitch until the wave passed over. We were breathing heavily and sweaty.
He got off me and collapsed next to me. We were both staring at the
ceiling. He turned and looked at me.
Nqoba: “ I love you. Thank you for being here with me during my time of
need. Baby i might not sat this much but you know that i love you. I do. I
am an idiot but you idiot and only your. What i need now is an answer”
Me: “ Answer?” i really was confused. He rested on his elbow and kissed
me before looking at me with a smile.
Nqoba: “ Look at your hand. Your left hand”
Oh my; what the hell???!
Nqubeko
My name is Nqubeko Clayton Msomi. Son of Dumisani and Cortney
Msomi. I am 27 years old and one brother Nqoba. I am sure you
have read about me so i will not bore you with the details but what i
can say is that i love Nokwazi more than anything in the world but
there are promises that i made to my mother that i cannot break.
On the day that she passed away she called me early morning to
talk to me. When i got to her ward she looked really beautiful like
she was going back home because she had even done her make up.
I walked closer to her bed and she smiled. Damn my mom is pretty. I
don’t know how she ended up with that monster of a man.
Mom: “ Why do you look so sad?” she asked in her angelic voice.
Me: “ You look ready to go home” she shook her head coughing.
Mom: “ You know that is impossible baby. Besides i get to be away
from that evil man” i sighed taking a seat next to her.
Me: “ Cortney why don’t you leave him?” he face changed.
Mom: “ You know very well why not.”
Me: “ I now have to marry that woman mama please. I can’t marry
her” she sighed.
Mom: “ What am i supposed to do Clayton. I am dying” she had
tears on her eyes.
Me: “ Mom i have to sacrifice my life because of your mistakes.”
Mom: “ Don’t you dare speak to me like that. Don’t you dare!”
Me: “ Ek is jammer ma” she rubbed my head. Clearly frustrated.
Mom: “ I might have something that can get you off the hook.” I
inched closer.
Me: “ What is it?” i was curious to know what it is.
Mom: “ It’s in a letter in YOUR safe. Now can we stop being gloomy.
I want to know about Nokwazi. It’s been 3 months son. You still
haven’t found her.” I was frustrated. Even Xoli didn’t know where
she is. I had people follow her but i couldn’t find her at all.
Me: “ I can’t find her mom. I have been turning the place upside
down” she chuckled.
Mom: “ Yey Clayton don’t piss me off. That is your happiness.” She
started breathing fast and the machines beeping. The nurses came
in and told me to wait outside. I called Nqoba.
Me: “ Please come to the hospital. It’s not looking good. Hurry”
I sat down and waited for the nurses. They came out in 20 minutes
smiling. I let out a deep breath i didn’t know i was holding. I went in
and sat by the window. I didn’t want to talk to her anymore but i
needed to be around her.
Nqoba finally arrived with Xoli. Xoli went to speak to mom while
Nqoba came to talk to me.
Nqoba: “ How is she?” he came and stood beside me.
Me: “ She is putting up a brave face but she is not well at all.” He
nodded and we fell silent.
Nqoba: “ Do you have to marry Carol” i looked at mom and smiled.
If i could keep this in just so she can be happy i will gladly do it.
Me: “ Yep. I love..”
Nqoba: “ Don’t lie. You and i both know that is not true. I know she
is sleeping with dad. Mom also knows so why marry her”
Me: “ Let it go Nqoba.” I said in a low tone.
Nqoba: “ I can’t just let it go. You are ruing your life and i will be
damned if i let you destroy it like that”
Me: “ I said let it go. I have to go. I love you bro” i kissed his head.
Yes kissed. He is my little brother and i love him. I will do anything
for him. Even if it means i marry Carol but i also needed someone in
my corner. I need Nokwazi. I know if i talk to her she will
understand.
I left and went back to my place. I smiled instantly. I remember that
day when she came here after leaving the party with her freakum
dress on. How i took her innocence. That was so special to me but
now i am left with this painful hole in my heart.
I went up to my room and took a shower. I wore my black Nike short
shorts and slept.
I was woken up by a ringing phone and when i looked outside it was
dark out. I answered the phone and it was the hospital telling me
that mom had passed on.
The following days Nqoba Xoli and i were planning the funeral. We
had family over and Carol had moved in to mom’s bedroom. One
morning i was summoned in the bedroom. I went in and they were
cuddling. Mind you mom wasn’t even buried yet.
Me: “ You called for me”
Carol: “ Yes dear. We no longer have to get married since your mom
made things easy for us and died” dad hissed.
Dad: “ Carol stay far from my wife’s name. We might not have been
happy these last 2 years but she will forever be my love” he looked
pained and i chuckled.
Me: “ Was that all baba?”
Dad: “ Yes and have someone bring your mam ncane breakfast” i
chuckled and left the room.
When i got to the kitchen i stopped dead on my track. Nqoba was
crying and Xoli was there comforting him. I felt so alone; mom left
me with a very tough burden. I got in and told mah Thuli to send up
breakfast.
Me: “ Xoli can i talk to you for a second?” she followed me and
Nqoba swallowed hard. Yes he is hard headed and rude but he
respects me and he knows i will beat up his ass if he tried any shit.
We went to the lounge and sat.
Me: “ I going to ask you this one last time. Where is Nokwazi?” she
looked scared.
Xoli: “ I don’t know. I really don’t know.” I knelt in front of her and
looked her in the eyes.
Me: “ I need you to help me locate her” she looked confused.
Xoli: “ How?” i sat back on the couch.
Me: “ After mom’s funeral. We will go find her” and i really was
going to bring her home with me. It’s been too long. I really miss
and need her.
Insert 10
Nokwazi
It’s been 5 months since I left. I am now 8 months pregnant. I heard that
Mrs Msomi passed away. I watched the funeral on t.v. Nqubeko was a
weeping mess. I saw Xoli was next to Nqoba all the time and Nqubeko
seemed lonely. I almost felt sorry for him but I just brushed it aside as her
hurt me.
Simo was coming to get me today. He wanted me closer to home when I
give birth; he is the only person who knew. So I woke up and took a bath.
I packed all my belongings putting them in my travelling bags. I went to
take a shower before taking a walk to a restaurant close by for breakfast.
I sat down by the corner and started eating my breakfast. I feel someone
looking at me. I looked around and people were eating and minding their
own business. I drank my water whilst waiting for breakfast. I looked up
and this freakishly beautiful woman with an afro was looking right at me. I
looked right back at her and she wasn’t backing down. I finally broke eye
contact and looked at the table.
I looked at her again and she was smiling while shaking her head. My
breakfast arrived and I started eating. She stood up and she walked over
to my table.
Lady: “ Mind if I sit?” I shrug my shoulder.
Me: “ It’s free country” she chuckled and sat down.
Lady: “ You have such a predictable schedule” my eyes shot up in shock.
Me: “ What are you talking about? Who are you?” I looked around the
restaurant.
Lady: “ Relax. I saw you a few months ago and I thought you look like
someone I know so I had you followed. You wake up in the morning; you
bath and come here for breakfast. You go back to the guesthouse and
take a nap. You wake up and eat KFC because those are your cravings.
You take another nap and you come back here for dinner. Go back;
watch t.v and pass out”
Me: “ Who are you? What do you want from me?” she smiled and leaned
back on her chair.
Lady: “ Your friend Simo. He is coming today to pick you up and you are
going back home. You know Nokwazi you are a mysterious woman. If I
wasn’t as connected I wouldn’t have found out who you really are” I was
shaking. I wanted to pee.
Me: “ I will scream if you don’t tell me who you are”
Lady: “ How is your mom and your brother?” I half screamed earning
some looks around the restaurant.
Me: “ Can you just…”
Lady: “ I am not trying to scare you but I would like you to meet my
mother. She will explain everything to you.”
Just then a middle age woman came in she was striking and gorgeous.
She was dressed in a below the knee dress and she also had an afro but
what drew me to her more was that we look so much alike. I was
puzzled. She sat down and smiled. She had dimpled just like me.
Woman: “ I don’t know what my crazy daughter said to you but you look
shaken. I apologise on her behalf. Let me introduce myself. My name is
Senamile Zulu; born Senamile Mngomezulu. I am the only daughter to 9
brothers one of them being Busani Mngomezulu. My parents are the king
and queen of the Mngomezulu kingdom. When my daughter told me that
she saw you I couldn’t believe it but you look so much like Busani I just
knew you were his.”
Me: “ What are you talking about? Who are you people?” she smiled and
placed her hand on top of my hand.
Sena: “ I am saying that your mother met your father when she was still a
young girl working at a hotel as a housekeeper. My brother saw her and
took advantage of her leaving her pregnant with you. He disappeared for
8 years and came back and your mother had your brother Sanele.”
Me: “ What exactly are you trying to say?” I was getting teary and I was
also breathing fast. This other lady stood up and got me sugared water
and I drank. I finally managed to calm down.
Sena: “ I am sorry for putting you in such a position but my father is very
sick. He would really like to meet you. He doesn’t have any much time
left”
Me: “ Could you stop talking in riddles and tell me what is going on?”
Lady: “ I am sorry for my rudeness but let me introduce myself. My name
is Sihle Dlamini; born Sihle Zulu and I believe we are cousins”
Me: “ Cousins?” she nodded.
Sihle: “ My uncle; the one is the king now Busani Mngomezulu is your
father. Like mom said he took advantage of your mother and told her if
she had you he will kill her. That is why she never talks about him
because she loves you guys and doesn’t want you pulled into this life”
Me: “ So you’re saying that my father doesn’t want me?” Sena nodded.
Sena: “ But we want you baby. We want to get you know you and…’
Before she could finish I heard a very painful kick on my tummy. I held on
to it until it calmed down.
Sihle: “ Are you okay?” she asked rubbing my back.
Me: “ Yes just that he kicked harder than usual. I need to go to the
bathroom..” I stood up and as I stood my water broke. It was too early. I
was only due in 3 weeks.
Sihle: “ Your water just broke” I wasn’t feeling any pain but I needed to
get to the hospital Asap.
Sena: “ Who can I call?”
Me: “ Please call Simo?” I was now starting to sweat. The people in the
restaurant were looking at me. Some taking pictures.
Sena: “ He is not answering” I shook my head no.
Me: “ Call Xoli” she dialled and waited but she also didn’t answer. I told
her to call Nqoba and it was the same response. I was sweating and I felt
the contractions come I screamed.
Sena: “ Please help us get her to the car” some waitress guy came and
carried me to the car. I was now screaming.
Sena: “ Who else can I call?” she was panicking and Sihle was driving.
Me: “ NQUBEKO! CALL NQUBEKO!!!”
Nqubeko
Life has been hard since mom died. I had no one but my brother but he
didn’t understand what i was going through. Let me take you back to the
Carol issue. When i found her screwing my father i was devastated
because i really liked her. I know i said to Nokwazi that i will propose to
Carol but that was just to rattle her. I hadn’t been with Carol for a while;
like as in sleep with her. I only slept with her that day at the office. After
that she told me she is pregnant. When i saw her with my dad i just knew
that he was the father.
Losing Nokwazi was aa bitter pill to swallow; very bitter. I wasn’t even
that concentrated at work. I was losing weight and i was just lost. I
wanted her in my arms. It’s been months of me searching for her and i
really couldn’t find her.
So today i have an important meeting that i had to attend. I woke up and
took a shower. Every morning i’d wake up and i always wished that she
was here with me. Waking up next to me. So i showered and got
dressed. I went downstairs and had my breakfast. I moved back to my
place. I couldn’t stay at my parent’s house because dad was playing
happy family with dad.
I stayed with Carol and proposed to her because i didn’t want mom
finding out about her and dad but it turns out mom knew long ago; before
me. So when we tried to cut ties with her she already knew some secrets
that dad told her when he was drunk. He regrets it every single day that
is why he caters to Carol.
I haven’t had time to read the letter. I was afraid of what i might find.
Nqoba is getting married in 2 months. I really can’t believe it. My meeting
was at 12h00 so i decided to catch up on my sports news.
Just as i say down my phone rang and it was an unknown number. I
immediately answered. As soon as i did i heard a scream in the back
ground.
Me: “ Nqubeko hello”
Caller: “ Hello my boy. You are speaking to Senamile Zulu. I am with
Nokwazi here and she...” i sprung up to my feet. I took my wallet and
keys.
Me: “ Where are you?” i heard Nokwazi scream again and it pierced in
my soul.
Sena: “ We are in R Bay. Come quickly. She is about to give birth” she
hung up leaving me shocked and frozen on spot. Kwazi is pregnant. I
quickly regain my senses and ran to my car. I started the car and called
Nqoba. I kept calling and calling. After some time he answered and he
sounded breathless.
Nqoba: “ You are interrupting me and my fiancé” he chuckled.
Me: “ I found her. I found Nokwazi.” I heard shuffling sounds and Xoli
asking Nqoba what’s going on.
Nqoba: “ How; where?”
Me: “ A woman called me and Nokwazi is in labour. She is in R Bay. I am
already on my way. So follow me already” i hung up and sped to where
she was.
I was very confused and when i counted it meant that the baby was mine.
I didn’t even have the right to be angry because i treated her like shit. I
will spend the rest of my life apologising. Had i told her what is going on
she would be here. We would be together and i would have been there
throughout her pregnancy.
I can imagine how she felt being all alone with people you don’t know. I
finally arrived and i made a call to the number.
Sena: “ Nqubeko where are you. She is very close”
Me: “ I need the name of the hospital” i was breathing hard.
Sena: “ The one in the city. It’s the only one” i heard Kwazi scream again
and i just went crazy. She hung up and i asked around for the hospital.
Turns out i was 5 minutes away.
I finally got there and i rushed in. I went to reception and they directed
me. I got to the labour ward and i immediately found her. She was with 2
ladies. When she saw me her face changed. I don’t know she hated me
maybe.
Kwazi: “ You came” she whispered. I went to her and kissed her sweaty
forehead.
Me: “ Of course i came. I had to come.” She nodded and held on to my
hand. She was squeezing the hell out of my hand. Just then a female Dr
walked in with gloves in her hands. They spread Nokwazi’s legs and i
nearly ran buy she pulled me to her.
Kwazi: “ You are going to stay asshole. You did this to me. You mother
fucker” the lady with the afro chuckled.
Dr: “ Okay we are ready. Miss Kheswa on the count of 3 i’m going to
need you to push for me okay?” she nodded blowing her breath.
Kwazi: “ I will do anything you want me to do. Just get the baby out of my
tummy”
Dr: “ Okay. One two three push”
Nokwazi pushed and pushed. It really was a struggle because she was at
it for 5 minutes before we saw any progress.
Dr: “ Okay i need one big push. I can see the head” she held on to my
hand and pushed screaming. I felt as if my bones were breaking.
Dr: “ That’s good. One more big push Kwazi” She pushed harder then
before and then the baby came out. We were welcomed by this tiny cry.
Dr: “ It’s a boy” Nokwazi smiled faintly and passed out.
Me: “ Dr she passed out” she came to my side and felt her pulse.
Dr: “ I will ask the nurses to clean her up and take her to her ward. For
now they are cleaning your son and you will see him shortly.
I stepped away from the bed and waited. I didn’t even acknowledge these
ladies that were with her. I was actually shocked. I found Nokwazi and i
also found out that she was pregnant. I am a father. The nurse came and
gave me the baby. He was covered in green hospital towels.
Nurse: “ He doesn’t have any clothes.”
Lady: “ I will go buy them” said the lady in an afro and she walked out.
Nurse: “ You want to hold him?” i nodded with my blurry eyes. She gave
him to me and i felt so emotional. That moment i just fell in love with this
boy. I just hope his mother forgives me. Lord knows how much i hurt her.
I will do anything and i mean anything even if it means telling her the truth
about everything.
Nokwazi
I woke up later with a very sore body. I looked around the ward and my
eyes landed on Nqubeko. He was crouching down by the baby cot; his
back facing me. He was making baby noises and i couldn’t help but
giggle. He quickly turned and looked at me frowning. He looked back at
the baby before kissing him and he stood up. He walked to me and took
a seat. We both fell into this awkward silence. Nqubeko cleared his throat
and i looked at him.
Nqubeko: “ I deserve me not knowing that you were pregnant. I deserve
not being there when he first kicked. Hell i don’t deserve to be here but
you are still the kind hearted woman i know” i lifted up my hand.
Me: “ Nqubeko i...” he stopped me.
Nqubeko: “ Can i just get this off my chest before you can say anything?”
i nodded.
Nqubeko: “ I hurt you. I hurt you so badly and i am sorry. I don’t even
have an excuse but allow me to tell you what happened and why things
turned out that way”
He stood up and walked to the window. He started telling me everything
not leaving a thing out. The way my emotions were playing with me. I
was sad and angry. I would cry but he kept talking until he was done. He
turned around and looked at me.
Nqubeko: “ I should have told you the truth. I know it was selfish of me to
do that but a lot of things were going through my mind. I couldn’t afford to
make a mistake but my biggest mistake was letting you go. I don’t
deserve your forgiveness but you knowing the truth makes me feel
better” his eyes were red from all the crying.
Me: “ So you’re saying that Carol knows all this, how did she find out?”
Nqubeko: “ She gave birth a few weeks ago by the way. She found out
when dad got drunk and slept with her. Their pillow talk was of that his
telling her everything” my blood started to boil.
Me: “You have selfish parents” he looked at me with his wide eyes.
Me: “ Seriously; they are selfish. How could they burden you with such?
It’s not your fight yet you took the fall for both of them. Now you are left
with this mess. Who protects you? Who is there for you?” his head hung
and he breathed out hard. I wanted to get out of bed and hold him but i
held myself.
Nqubeko: “ I have no one. It’s all my fault. I..” i interrupted him.
Me: “ It’s your selfish parents fault. What’s in the letter?”
Nqubeko: “ Leverage. I haven’t even read it. I was looking for you all
these months” i sighed.
Me: “ You even look like a grandpa. How have you been?” he looked at
me and chuckled.
Nqubeko: “ I’ll be alright. At least i know where you are and i will come
visit our son. Would you like to see him? We have been so consumed by
my problems you haven’t even met champ. He is adorable” he said
walking to his cot. He took him out and he cried. I smiled. Nqubeko had
this smile on his face; i have never seen it before. He walked to me with
the baby and he gave him to me.
Nqubeko: “ Careful with his head” i looked at him and he raised up his
hands.
Me: “ Chill daddy of the year” he chuckled.
I then looked at this beautiful tiny soul in my hands. He looked so much
like Nqubeko it was freaky. I looked at him and he grinned.
Nqubeko: “ I know. He looks like daddy” he winked.
I looked at my boy once more. He had so much hair no wonder i always
had heart burn. I kissed his tiny lips and he pouted. He even had
Nqubeko’s complexion: Yellow Bone. He really loomed coloured. Just as i
was having a moment with my son the door bursts open and in came
Nqoba and Xoli. Nqoba rushed to bed and kisses my cheeks.
Nqoba: “ Oh my god we have been looking for you! Don’t ever do that to
us. My brother even aged a bit” i wanted to laugh i really do but it was
awkward because of what Nqubeko told me. I looked at Nqubeko and he
mouthed “ Relax” i let out a breath before i giggled.
Me: “ I wanted to breath a different air” all this time Xoli was standing afar
and she was crying. I gave the baby to Nqoba and opened my arms to
Xoli. She was shaking her head and crying.
Me: “ Come here” Xoli is such a cry baby. She ran and threw herself in
my arms;ouch. The brothers looked at us then back to the baby.
Xoli: “ How could you leave like that? Aren’t we supposed to be sisters?”
she cried and i wiped her tears before cupping her face.
Me: “ I couldn’t stay. Don’t ask me why but i just couldn’t stay” she
nodded and i hugged her again. Nqubeko took his son and marched to
me.
Nqubeko: “ Baby we haven’t given him a name”
Nqoba: “ baby?” Nqubeko’s cheeks heated clearly embarrassed.
Me: “ Leave my baby daddy alone” we all laughed.
Me: “ What would you like to name him?”
Nqubeko: “ How about Siphesihle Austin” i liked the Siphesihle one but i
wasn’t sure about the Austin.
Me: “ Does he really need the 2nd name?” Nqubeko smiled shyly. He
really liked the Austin.
Nqubeko: “ Well if you don’t like it it’s fine” he chuckled nervously.
Me: “ Siphesihle Clayton Kheswa” he lifted his head beaming.
Nqubeko: “ I love it!” he kissed his son and Sphe cried. The nurse got it.
Nurse: “ Time to eat. Time for breast feeding mommy” she smiled.
I took out my boob getting ready to feed him. The nurse showed me how
and Sphe started sucking. He was sucking for dear life and it was very
painful. Conversation was flowing but Nqubeko just zoned out looking at
me breast feed his son.
Nqoba: “ I am going to the canteen. Does anyone need anything?” i
shook my head no.
Xoli: “ I’m coming with you” they left the room and it was just me; Sphe
and Nqubeko.
Nqubeko: “ Could you please keep what i told you to yourself; you can’t
even tell Xoli”
Me: “ I promise i won’t tell anyone but you need to get things off your
chest.” He shook his head no.
Nqubeko: “ I’ll be fine. As long as this stays between us i’ll be okay” i
looked at this selfless man and felt sorry for him. To carry such a burden
because of selfish parents. Xoli and Nqoba came back. We had a snack
and later they left.
Me: “ Can i talk to you about something?” he was looking at his son.
Nqubeko: “ Yes. We can talk” he wasn’t even paying attention to me.
Me: “ NQUBEKO!!” i shouted and he jumped causing me to laugh.
Me: “ Eyes over here” he looked at Sphe.
Nqubeko: “ Mommy is jealous already” he kissed him and walked to me.
Me: “ Can you get my mom for me? I really need to see her” he nodded.
Nqubeko: “ Okay. I will get on it right away. Simo called...” he walked
towards the window.
Me: “ Nqubeko it’s not what you think” he smiled.
Nqubeko: “ You don’t owe me any explanations. I hurt you so you are
allowed to move on. It’s your life and...”
Me: “ Nqubeko..” he didn’t hear me instead he continued talking.
Nqubeko: “ I mean you are beautiful; smart sexy. Any guy would be lucky
to have you”
Me: “ Nqubeko...” i called him again but did he answer? Nope.
Nqubeko: “ I messed up. I should be happy for you. I mean i will be
happy for you.”
Me: “ NQUBEKO!” i shouted yet again and he kept quiet.
Me: “ Thank you. Simo is not my boyfriend. He has been helping me with
everything and he is the one who helped me hide” i sighed.
Me: “ He is not my man. Nqubeko; Simo is gay” he looked at me his eyes
wide and what he did next was very unexpected. He did the gwara
gwara.
After that victory dance that Nqubeko did i couldn’t stop laughing. I don’t
know what’s going on between us and i wasn’t going to bring it up until he
does. I now understand why he had done those things he did but when
he told me he loves me not so long ago i felt like flying. I wasn’t going to
give in just yet; yes i understand his reasons but had to make him sweat
a little.
He was in love with Siphe it wasn’t even funny. The door opened and my
mom got in followed by Sanele. My heart nearly stopped. I know i asked
Nqubeko to call mom but i wasn’t ready to face her yet. As soon as she
saw me she rushed to me and hugged me. She just cried. All this while
Sanele was standing by the door biting on his hands.
Nqubeko wasn’t even paying attention to us. He was rocking his son.
After crying and hugging me ; kissing me all over my face mom finally
calmed down.
Mom: “ I am so glad you’re okay. I thought i lost you forever” she said
wiping her tears.
Me: “ I am sorry mom. I didn’t know what else to do plus i had
disappointed you”
Mom: “ Nokwazi you are 23 years old; you have a place of your own. I
had you when i was 19. I had no one but you; you have me. You chose to
run away. Why?” i looked down shaking my head.
Me: “ I was ashamed mom plus i thought Nqubeko didn’t want anything to
do with me and...” Nqubeko cleared his throat so much that he coughed. I
gave him a look and after that he walked to Siphe’s bed and placed him
in it.
Nqubeko: “ I’ll be outside. Call me if you need me” he walked out
pushing Sanele out with him and mom sighed.
Mom: “ At least he took Sane out of here. Poor boy has been devastated.
He hasn’t said a thing since we left home”
Me: “ I’m really sorry mom. I...”she put up her hand and walked to the
baby cot. She looked at Siphe and took him.
Mom: “ He looks just like his yellow bone father” i chuckled. She cuddled
him and went to sit again.
Me: “ I didn’t know what to do plus mom we are trying to put Sanele
through school and then here i am pregnant with a baby that i didn’t even
know if his father would want him. I am sorry mom”
Mom: “ Your sorries are just not enough. Didn’t i raise you to always talk
to me when something is troubling you?”
Me: “ You did mom and...” she raised up her hand to stop me from
talking.
Mom: “ I am still talking. You will shut your pap eating hole and listen to
what i have to say.” I quickly nodded while she looked at Siphe and
kissed his forehead.
Mom: “ Having you was unplanned but i told myself that i would never let
anyone hurt you. Your brother as well. I know you didn’t get everything
you wanted when you were young but i did try my best with you. For you
to run away like that...” she said shaking her head and her eyes were
glossy with tears.
Mom: “ I am disappointed in you. Not because you fell pregnant; hell you
could have gotten pregnant by an old men i don’t care but the fact that
you ran. You ran like i am a monster who was going to shout and throw
you out?” she was now crying and i felt very bad.
Me: “ I am so sorry mom. I really am” she shook her head laughing.
Mom: “ You should be glad this yellow child is handsome. I would have
slapped you back to virginity” i held my mouth and giggled.
After that we laughed and talked about things. How things have been and
how we missed each other.
Mom: “ Thank you for the money you sent every month. It helped a whole
lot.”
Me: “ I am just glad that Sma paid me still. I don’t know what i would have
done but Simo has been helping me a lot.” She gave me a look.
Mom: “ Hmmm Simo now” i laughed.
Me: “ Mom Simo is my gay friend. He is my boss’s very gay son. Don’t
worry mom. Nqubeko is the one i love. Not sure if he feels the same”
mom gave me a smile.
Mom: “ If only you knew. That man searched high and low for you. He
came to my house EVERYDAY asking the very same question since you
have been gone”
Me: “ Really?” i beamed and mom chuckled.
Mom: “ Look at you bitch clit dancing like car wipes” i laughed very loudly
but was interrupted by the rough opening of the door and in came this
handsome tall old man with 2 other buff guys behind him.
Mom: “ Busani” mom whispered and she looked really scared.
Busani: “ So it’s true. You really did give birth to your bastards”
Me: “ Excuse me what?” i interrupted but he gave me a scary look.
Busani: “ Was i talking to you?”
Me: “ Who are you calling a bastard?”
Mom: “ Nokwazi please. I will handle this” mom was shaking and this
man was walking to her slowly. She had my son is her arms and she
looked like she was about to drop him.
Me: “ Mom give me Siphe” she gave me Siphe and turned to this guy
swallowing hard.
Busani: “ I told you. Londiwe i told you that i don’t want kids. I told you to
kill them but you went and had them anyways. What the fuck is wrong
with you?” he shouted and i jumped.
Mom: “ I have never asked you for shit so please don’t come here telling
me crap about MY children”
Busani: “ Children?”
Mom: “ Yes. It’s Nokwazi and Sanele. You fucked and left me. TWICE. I
was young yet you took advantage of me.”
Busani: “ You wanted me just as i wanted you.”
Mom: “ I was 18. You were 26! You should have fucking known better!”
she was yelling and cussing. To be honest i have never heard mom cuss.
Busani: “ You were stupid and naive virgin. Did you think i would love
you? Me ; a Prince love you? A commoner?” mom marched to him.
Mom: “ I don’t give a shit who you were or are right now. You stay the
fuck away from my kids” he was about to answer when the door opened
and Nqubeko walked in.
Nqubeko: “ What’s going on in here? You guys we could hear you from
down the hall?”
Busani: “ And you are? Can’t you see we are talking?”
Nqubeko: “ Could you keep it down please?”
Busani: “ Do you know who i am? Boy you don’t get to tell me what to
do!” he shouted and pointed his index finger at Nqubeko. Nqubeko just
chuckled and walked towards me with Sanele right behind him.
Nqubeko: “ I don’t give a shit who you are. You watch how you talk in
front of my family.”
Busani: “ You don’t get to talk to me like that. I can...”
Nqubeko: “ I said i don’t care who you are. This is my family. All of them.
Watch how you talk or else there is the door behind you” Busani’s eyes
widened in shock while mom had that satisfied smile on her face. I was
also shocked and Sanele had a huge grin on his face. Nqubeko on the
other hand took his son from me and kissed him. This Busani guy looked
at Nqubeko clearly pissed. He clicked his tongue and stormed out.
To say i was stunned was an understatement i was beyond shocked and
Nqubeko was so chilled looking at his son. Mom giggled and i gave her a
look.
Mom: “ That man is dangerous. He could have you killed”
Nqubeko: “ Yeah yeah. I also have my connections so i will sort him out if
i have to. Don’t care if he is King. If he doesn’t show respect he must just
stay far away” he kissed Siphe’s forehead. Sanele cleared his throat.
Sanele: “ Errrr bhut Nqubeko could you teach...teach me that?” he gently
placed Siphe on his bed and turned to Sanele.
Nqubeko: “ Teach you what?”
Sanele: “ To stand up for myself like that and...” Nqubeko interrupted him.
Nqubeko: “ You and me are linked for life. Stick with me” the fist bumped
and laughed. Mom just smiled shaking hiss head.
Mom: “ Don’t you want to rest a bit baby? We’re just going to get coffee,
me and Sanele.”
Sanele: “ Mom i just came from...” she interrupted him.
Mom: “ I did not ask you. When i come back; you Nqubeko have a lot of
explaining to do. You might have saved the day by fixing Busani but you
and i are still going to talk” mom walked out followed by Sanele.
Nqubeko came and sat on a chair next the bed. He took my hand and
placed a kiss on the back of it sending chills down my spine. I looked at
out hands and mine seemed so dark against his.
Nqubeko: “ Look at me” he said in a low deep voice i almost didn’t hear
him. I looked at him ad damn damn damn. Nqubeko keeps getting cuter.
He blinked a couple of times before he looked down at our hands and
back to my eyes again. Let me tell you about his light grey eyes with his
eyebrows; pink lips and nicely trimmed beard.
Nqubeko: “ I can never apologise enough to you and i will spend the rest
of my life doing so. I meant it when i said i love you and i will wait for you
Nokwazi. I will wait until you are ready to forgive me. “
I looked at him smiling. He looked really nervous.
Nqubeko: “ I’m pouring out my heart to you and you find that amusing” i
laughed while he chuckled.
Me: “ I hear you Nqubeko. It’s too soon to say but give me time to
process all of this okay?” he kissed my hand again.
Nqubeko: “ That’s all i ask for my love. I love you” he stood up and placed
a long baby kiss on my lips.
Me: “ I love you too” i replied when he pulled back. He looked shocked.
Nqubeko: “ Don’t worry. I won’t rush you to anything. As long as you love
me” he smiled.
The door opened yet again and Sihle got in with her mother. I rolled my
eyes. Why do people keep invading my space so much today. Sihle
walked to where Siphe was and she was about to pick Siphe out when
Nqubeko cleared his throat. We all turned and looked at him.
Nqubeko: “ Please wash and sanitise your hands before touching my
son. Babe; i’ll go join your mom outside” he kissed my lips again before
he left. Sena looked at him until he walked out before she whistled. I
wanted to laugh but i was pissed at the stunt they pulled.
Sihle: “ Baby daddy is bitter” she didn’t even pick him up. She looked at
him and came to stand next to her mother.
Me: “ He should be bitter after that visit we got from Busani Mngomezulu”
both their eyes widened and they turned to look at each other.
Sena: “ How did he know?!”
Sihle: “ Grandpa probably asked him. You know how he can’t zip it these
days”
Me: “ Please tell him to stay away. He called my brother and i bastards”
Sena exclaimed.
Sihle: “ Mom tell your brother to stay away before i deal with him” i raised
up my hands.
Me: “ I don’t even want to hear it. I was fine without you guys. You should
just leave me alone. I am 23 years old. My mom has been taking care of
me and my brother all these years so you can go”
Sihle: “ But we..i...” i cut her off.
Me: “ No; you have done enough. Tell your grandfather i can’t come see
him. We can’t come see him. I don’t want to cause trouble and i don’t like
putting my family in danger.”
Sena: “ I will talk to my brother. Please just see my dad this once. Please”
i shook my head no.
Me: “ You should have seen how terrified my mom was. If anything i am
loyal to my mother till the end so no thanks. It was nice meeting you guys
but please leave” Sihle looked pissed but i really didn’t care.
Sena: “ Nokwazi we...” Sihle cut her off.
Sihle: “ Mom leave it. Let’s go” she took her mom’s hand and walked out.
I let out a breath that i did not know i was holding in. As in queue mom;
Sanele and Nqubeko came back. He was carrying a spur paper bag.
Mom: “ Baby we have to leave now. We are going to see you tomorrow” i
suddenly felt sad.
Me: “ Do you guys have to leave?”
Sanele: “ We’ll be back sis. Plus bhut Nqubeko said he...” Nqubeko
nudged him and he kept quiet. Mon laughed.
Nqubeko: “ Dr said he will discharge you tomorrow.” I smiled.
Mom: “ Yes and we can talk about damages.” My eyes shot up. Nqubeko
just looked at the floor. He took out his hands from his pockets.
Nqubeko: “ Yes Miss Kheswa” he looked so shy hehe i wanted to laugh.
Mom: “ Yes i want 8 cows” i shot up from bed. Nqubeko didn’t seem
fazed.
Me: “ Mom that’s too much!”
Mom: “ What do you know about damages?! You Nqubeko; i want those
8 cows. 3 for her virginity and 5 for Siphesihle.” She headed towards the
door.
Nqubeko: “ Yes mah. I will talk to my uncles.”
Mom: “ Oh that amounts to R112 000. I would like that in cash please.
Bye kids” Yoooh my mom
Xoli
After Nokwazi left things haven’t been the same. Nqoba and I fight a lot
and he has gone back to sleeping with random chicks. Its become so bad
that I told him we need a break. Its been 3 months since she left. I did go
to where our dreams are but all I found was letters for me and her mom.
Inside my letters was rent money and photo scans of the baby. Every
time when I left the place I always felt sad and it broke my heart more
because I thought I would never see my friend again.
Today I woke up feeling a bit out of it; must have been the wine. Its my
day off so I will just clean around the flat and catch up on some sleep. I
haven’t been sleeping well. Been thinking about Nqoba and he has been
shutting me out. So I woke up and had breakfast.
After breakfast I cleaned around the flat and took a shower afterwards
because I had done my laundry the previous night. Just when I was
about to sit down there was a knock on the door. I opened and it was
Nqoba. He looked horrible.
Me: “ What are you doing here Nqoba?”
Nqoba: “ Can I come in?” he had teary eyes. I made way for him and he
got in. I closed the door and walked to the lounge. I was wearing his tshirt
and socks. He looked at me before sitting down.
Me: “ What do you want Nqobani?” he scratched his head before looking
at me. He had his car keys and phone in his hand.
Nqoba: “ I miss my baby. I miss you” I chuckled.
Me: “ It’s been 2 months. You busy fucking random bitches and now that
you have had enough you just waltz in here telling me you miss me? Get
out of here. Don’t make me laugh”
Nqoba: “ I am sorry Xolile ka Nqobani. I have been going through some
stuff and…”
Me: “ So you thought you’d hurt me by fucking around and come back tell
me that shit? It doesn’t work like that. It’s either you tell me what is
bothering you or just fuck out of here”
Nqoba: “ My mom is sick okay. She is sick and there is nothing anybody
can do right now. She’s holding on for Nqubeko. That’s all.
Me: “ What do you mean she is holding on for Nqubeko?”
Nqoba: “ She is holding on for his wedding” he sighed and knelt in front of
me.
Nqoba: “ I have been stupid. I regret it and I love you. I really love you
Xoli but I am going to need you to tell me where Nokwazi is.” I chuckled
in disbelief.
Me: “ Get out! Get the fuck out of here!” I shouted and stood up to open
the door for him.
Nqoba: “ You need to keep calm. Nqubeko would like to see her one
more time before the wedding”
Me: “ You mean fuck her and leave her like used condoms? Fuck you
Nqobani. Just leave”
Nqoba: “ Stop swearing Xolile” he was getting angry but I wasn’t backing
down either.
Me: “ Leave and go tell that dick brother of yours that he will never find
Xoli” he suddenly got angry and charged for me but he was stopped by
his ringing phone.
Nqoba: “ Bro” he listened and nodded his head after that he placed his
phone in his pocket.
Nqoba: “ Get dressed. You’re coming with me” I looked at him as if he
was crazy.
Me: “ I’m going nowhere with you Nqobani.” He got closer and cupped
my face.
Nqoba: “ Please come with me; after that I will leave you alone. Please
just this one last time” I walked to my bedroom and threw in my jeans
and an over sized hoodie that belongs to Nqoba and my push ins. I got to
the lounge and took my keys and phone.
We left and Nqoba locked the flat. We hurried downstairs and got in his
cars. He drove away in speed. I didn’t even want to ask him where we’re
going. After that reckless driving we finally got to Chief Albert Luthuli
Hospital. We specifically went to the Oncology department.
I walked slower but he pulled me like a child I was just irritated. We got to
this nicely decorated ward. First thing I noticed was a very depressed and
crying Nqubeko but what puzzled me was that his mom was sitting on the
bed reading a book.
I have seen her on the net and news papers but not in person and can I
just say that she is a freakishly gorgeous coloured lady. That is where
these guys get their complexion from. Nqoba was still holding my hand
and we walked towards the bed. She looked up at us and smiled.
Mrs M: “ Aaah you finally decided to bring her with” I was puzzled.
Nqoba: Come one Mom. I told you I’d bring her.” He kissed her cheek
and pulled me to him.
Mrs M: “Get away Quinton. I need to see this beautiful girl right here” she
pushed and he chuckled. He kissed my lips before walking to Nqubeko
leaving me with his mom.
Mrs M: “ Come closer. How are you?” she had the sweetest voice.
Me: “ I’m okay Mrs Msomi. How are you?” she smiled. She had dimples.
Mrs M: “ Call me mom. I am okay given the circumstances.”
Me: “ Do you need anything? Are you comfortable?” she placed her soft
warm hand on top of mine.
Mrs M: “ I’m okay baby. Come sit. I want to talk to you” I sat down with
her holding my hand.
Me: “ I see Nqoba is bringing in the big guns” she laughed.
Mrs M: “ I know my son can be a dick sometimes hell he is a dick but he
loves you. You are all he talks about and I know he hurt you buy I need
you to do something for me” I was now in tears because this woman was
speaking as if she didn’t have much time left.
Me: “ Anything” she smiled and wiped her tears.
Mrs M: “ Take care of him. Take care of my son when I am gone. He is
going to need you. I am sorry for doing this to you and I am sure if your
parents were still alive they wouldn’t allow you to get back together to a
man who has hurt you this much” I nodded and I was now sobbing.
Mrs M: “ Please stay with him. When Nqoba goes through something
tragic he tends to do stupid things but I need you to be strong for him. Be
there for him”
Me: “ You can’t leave yet. Please Nqoba and I just found each other. I just
met you and i..”
Mrs M: “ Shhh. Everything will be okay but I have one more request.” She
wiped my tears.
Me: “ I will do it”
Mrs M: “ Find your friend for me. Nqubeko is going to need her. He might
have made a fool of everyone else but I know my son. Find her. He will
need her. For now let me rest. I want to rest” I just cried and I felt
someone hold me. It was Nqoba. We stayed and spoke for a long time
before we went back to my place. We ordered food and cuddled. That
night Nqoba received a call that his mom had passed on.
Xoli
The following days were hard on Nqoba but Nqubeko was a weeping
mess. I could see that something was eating him but he just buried
himself at work. Nqoba was clingy. I even had to take leave at work
because he always had to have me by his side.
So today is Friday; the day we bring home Nqoba’s mom home. He has
been crying since we woke up and yes; i am over at his parents place.
We have been staying there since the passing of his mother. I not only
have to look after 1 guy no; i have to look after 2 guys. Nqubeko doesn’t
even know if we’re coming or going.
I got up from bed and took a quick but soothing shower and rushed back
to the bedroom. I wore my boob tube maxi tribal dress with a doek and a
cardigan. I wore my nude pumps and took my phone before kissing
Nqoba on his head. He cried till he fell asleep this morning. I am so late; i
was supposed to help start breakfast.
I got to the kitchen and it was only mam Thuli; the helper in the kitchen
with Nqubeko. He looked better. He was drinking coffee whole
concentrating on his phone.
Me: “ Morning” Mah Thuli just smiled and continued with what she was
doing.
Nqubeko: “ Morning” he smiled faintly.
Me: “ How are you holding up?” he nodded.
Nqubeko: “ As expected. I don’t even know what to do with myself
anymore” i went to hug him and we were disturbed.
Nqoba: “ Baby. Come” i turned around and he was pouting. I wanted to
laugh but i held myself. I followed him out and went to the bedroom. As
soon as i closed the door i was attacked with a breath taking kiss. He
pushed me to bed and started taking off my clothes. That’s when i
stopped him.
Me: “ Baby we can’t. We need to start getting things ready for your mom’s
arrival” he had tears in his eyes.
Nqoba: “ Baby please; i need to feel something. I need you baby please”
he let out a sob and it tore my heart.
I kicked off my pumps and took off the dress as the cardigan was long
gone. I was only left with my panties because i wasn’t wearing a bra.
He sat at the edge of the bed and pulled me to him. He placed his head
on my tummy and i held on to him. I kept brushing his head while his
hand went up my thigh. It came in contact with my panties and it stopped.
He moved it aside and his finger sank in. I moaned out loud because i
was already wet. He took on leg and put it on top of the bed Captain
Morgan.
His tongue swept over my nub and i threw my head back. He pulled away
and i looked down to him. He was looking at me with a smirk on his face.
His face changed to this hard look and he tore my panties causing me to
yelp because the material bit my on my skin.
He pushed his hand deep inside causing me to stand on my toes. He
pulled me back down and drew out his finger. He looked at me and
sucked on his cum filled finger. He took my leg and placed it on his
shoulder so fast i stumbled but he held me preventing me from falling.
He inhaled before his tongue swept in my num. He came back licking his
lips making that “mpa” sound. He turned me around and threw me in bed.
He spread my legs wide open before sitting on his legs. His eyes getting
smaller. He shook his head causing me to shudder.
He laid on his tummy and brought me close. My nana was right in front of
him. His tongue dove in but it wasn’t going as hard and fast. He was very
slow like he was French kissing my nana and it felt heavenly. He used his
fingers to separate my folds and his tongue danced on my very hard nub.
It was too much. I wanted to release but he pulled back and looked at
me.
Nqoba: “ Do you know how much i love you?” he dove back in this time
he picked up the pace because his tongue was going in and out of me
fast. I felt myself drawing near but he quickly pulled back and sat on his
legs.
Nqoba: “ I asked you a question my love” i tried getting up but he pushed
me back down.
Me: “ Nqoba please” my knees were shaking. I really needed to release.
He laughed. He took off his sweat pants and he was only left with his
boxers. He got on top of me and his guy was directly to my nana. He then
started dry humping me. I also started moving fast and furiously. I really
needed to cum but he caught on and got off me.
I opened my eyes and looked at him. His boxers had a big wet spot as
evidence of my wet and horniness. I really needed to cum. He got of the
bed and went to his closet leaving me on the bed like a chicken. He came
back and i heard a buzzing sound. When i looked up he was carrying my
mini purple vibrator. Where the hell did he get it from?
He took off his boxers and his guy popped out. I wanted to out my mouth
on him as he looked so yummy and tasty so i went on all fours and took
him in my mouth without using my hands. He pushed me back and also
got in bed kneeling. I continued giving him a messy but awesome deep
throat because i could hear it in his groans that i was doing a good job. I
felt the vibrator make an entrance in my nana and i jumped.
That gave him an opportunity to flip me over. It was so fast i didn’t even
have time to react as i felt him inside me. His guy was twitching inside me
and i instantly came. I screamed so loud he took a pillow and covered my
face. After that ground shaking orgasm he started again. It was as if i
fuelled him because he started moving hard and fast placing the vibrator
on my nub. I lost all my senses. I was speaking in tongues even i didn’t
understand what i was saying.
I felt the next wave coming and it hit me hard like a ton of brick and he
wasn’t far behind. We were both shaking and moving still. I don’t even
know where the vibrator went but it was no longer there. We continues to
twitch until the wave passed over. We were breathing heavily and sweaty.
He got off me and collapsed next to me. We were both staring at the
ceiling. He turned and looked at me.
Nqoba: “ I love you. Thank you for being here with me during my time of
need. Baby i might not sat this much but you know that i love you. I do. I
am an idiot but you idiot and only your. What i need now is an answer”
Me: “ Answer?” i really was confused. He rested on his elbow and kissed
me before looking at me with a smile.
Nqoba: “ Look at your hand. Your left hand”
Oh my; what the hell???!
Nqubeko
My name is Nqubeko Clayton Msomi. Son of Dumisani and Cortney
Msomi. I am 27 years old and one brother Nqoba. I am sure you
have read about me so i will not bore you with the details but what i
can say is that i love Nokwazi more than anything in the world but
there are promises that i made to my mother that i cannot break.
On the day that she passed away she called me early morning to
talk to me. When i got to her ward she looked really beautiful like
she was going back home because she had even done her make up.
I walked closer to her bed and she smiled. Damn my mom is pretty. I
don’t know how she ended up with that monster of a man.
Mom: “ Why do you look so sad?” she asked in her angelic voice.
Me: “ You look ready to go home” she shook her head coughing.
Mom: “ You know that is impossible baby. Besides i get to be away
from that evil man” i sighed taking a seat next to her.
Me: “ Cortney why don’t you leave him?” he face changed.
Mom: “ You know very well why not.”
Me: “ I now have to marry that woman mama please. I can’t marry
her” she sighed.
Mom: “ What am i supposed to do Clayton. I am dying” she had
tears on her eyes.
Me: “ Mom i have to sacrifice my life because of your mistakes.”
Mom: “ Don’t you dare speak to me like that. Don’t you dare!”
Me: “ Ek is jammer ma” she rubbed my head. Clearly frustrated.
Mom: “ I might have something that can get you off the hook.” I
inched closer.
Me: “ What is it?” i was curious to know what it is.
Mom: “ It’s in a letter in YOUR safe. Now can we stop being gloomy.
I want to know about Nokwazi. It’s been 3 months son. You still
haven’t found her.” I was frustrated. Even Xoli didn’t know where
she is. I had people follow her but i couldn’t find her at all.
Me: “ I can’t find her mom. I have been turning the place upside
down” she chuckled.
Mom: “ Yey Clayton don’t piss me off. That is your happiness.” She
started breathing fast and the machines beeping. The nurses came
in and told me to wait outside. I called Nqoba.
Me: “ Please come to the hospital. It’s not looking good. Hurry”
I sat down and waited for the nurses. They came out in 20 minutes
smiling. I let out a deep breath i didn’t know i was holding. I went in
and sat by the window. I didn’t want to talk to her anymore but i
needed to be around her.
Nqoba finally arrived with Xoli. Xoli went to speak to mom while
Nqoba came to talk to me.
Nqoba: “ How is she?” he came and stood beside me.
Me: “ She is putting up a brave face but she is not well at all.” He
nodded and we fell silent.
Nqoba: “ Do you have to marry Carol” i looked at mom and smiled.
If i could keep this in just so she can be happy i will gladly do it.
Me: “ Yep. I love..”
Nqoba: “ Don’t lie. You and i both know that is not true. I know she
is sleeping with dad. Mom also knows so why marry her”
Me: “ Let it go Nqoba.” I said in a low tone.
Nqoba: “ I can’t just let it go. You are ruing your life and i will be
damned if i let you destroy it like that”
Me: “ I said let it go. I have to go. I love you bro” i kissed his head.
Yes kissed. He is my little brother and i love him. I will do anything
for him. Even if it means i marry Carol but i also needed someone in
my corner. I need Nokwazi. I know if i talk to her she will
understand.
I left and went back to my place. I smiled instantly. I remember that
day when she came here after leaving the party with her freakum
dress on. How i took her innocence. That was so special to me but
now i am left with this painful hole in my heart.
I went up to my room and took a shower. I wore my black Nike short
shorts and slept.
I was woken up by a ringing phone and when i looked outside it was
dark out. I answered the phone and it was the hospital telling me
that mom had passed on.
The following days Nqoba Xoli and i were planning the funeral. We
had family over and Carol had moved in to mom’s bedroom. One
morning i was summoned in the bedroom. I went in and they were
cuddling. Mind you mom wasn’t even buried yet.
Me: “ You called for me”
Carol: “ Yes dear. We no longer have to get married since your mom
made things easy for us and died” dad hissed.
Dad: “ Carol stay far from my wife’s name. We might not have been
happy these last 2 years but she will forever be my love” he looked
pained and i chuckled.
Me: “ Was that all baba?”
Dad: “ Yes and have someone bring your mam ncane breakfast” i
chuckled and left the room.
When i got to the kitchen i stopped dead on my track. Nqoba was
crying and Xoli was there comforting him. I felt so alone; mom left
me with a very tough burden. I got in and told mah Thuli to send up
breakfast.
Me: “ Xoli can i talk to you for a second?” she followed me and
Nqoba swallowed hard. Yes he is hard headed and rude but he
respects me and he knows i will beat up his ass if he tried any shit.
We went to the lounge and sat.
Me: “ I going to ask you this one last time. Where is Nokwazi?” she
looked scared.
Xoli: “ I don’t know. I really don’t know.” I knelt in front of her and
looked her in the eyes.
Me: “ I need you to help me locate her” she looked confused.
Xoli: “ How?” i sat back on the couch.
Me: “ After mom’s funeral. We will go find her” and i really was
going to bring her home with me. It’s been too long. I really miss
and need her.
Insert 10
Nokwazi
It’s been 5 months since I left. I am now 8 months pregnant. I heard that
Mrs Msomi passed away. I watched the funeral on t.v. Nqubeko was a
weeping mess. I saw Xoli was next to Nqoba all the time and Nqubeko
seemed lonely. I almost felt sorry for him but I just brushed it aside as her
hurt me.
Simo was coming to get me today. He wanted me closer to home when I
give birth; he is the only person who knew. So I woke up and took a bath.
I packed all my belongings putting them in my travelling bags. I went to
take a shower before taking a walk to a restaurant close by for breakfast.
I sat down by the corner and started eating my breakfast. I feel someone
looking at me. I looked around and people were eating and minding their
own business. I drank my water whilst waiting for breakfast. I looked up
and this freakishly beautiful woman with an afro was looking right at me. I
looked right back at her and she wasn’t backing down. I finally broke eye
contact and looked at the table.
I looked at her again and she was smiling while shaking her head. My
breakfast arrived and I started eating. She stood up and she walked over
to my table.
Lady: “ Mind if I sit?” I shrug my shoulder.
Me: “ It’s free country” she chuckled and sat down.
Lady: “ You have such a predictable schedule” my eyes shot up in shock.
Me: “ What are you talking about? Who are you?” I looked around the
restaurant.
Lady: “ Relax. I saw you a few months ago and I thought you look like
someone I know so I had you followed. You wake up in the morning; you
bath and come here for breakfast. You go back to the guesthouse and
take a nap. You wake up and eat KFC because those are your cravings.
You take another nap and you come back here for dinner. Go back;
watch t.v and pass out”
Me: “ Who are you? What do you want from me?” she smiled and leaned
back on her chair.
Lady: “ Your friend Simo. He is coming today to pick you up and you are
going back home. You know Nokwazi you are a mysterious woman. If I
wasn’t as connected I wouldn’t have found out who you really are” I was
shaking. I wanted to pee.
Me: “ I will scream if you don’t tell me who you are”
Lady: “ How is your mom and your brother?” I half screamed earning
some looks around the restaurant.
Me: “ Can you just…”
Lady: “ I am not trying to scare you but I would like you to meet my
mother. She will explain everything to you.”
Just then a middle age woman came in she was striking and gorgeous.
She was dressed in a below the knee dress and she also had an afro but
what drew me to her more was that we look so much alike. I was
puzzled. She sat down and smiled. She had dimpled just like me.
Woman: “ I don’t know what my crazy daughter said to you but you look
shaken. I apologise on her behalf. Let me introduce myself. My name is
Senamile Zulu; born Senamile Mngomezulu. I am the only daughter to 9
brothers one of them being Busani Mngomezulu. My parents are the king
and queen of the Mngomezulu kingdom. When my daughter told me that
she saw you I couldn’t believe it but you look so much like Busani I just
knew you were his.”
Me: “ What are you talking about? Who are you people?” she smiled and
placed her hand on top of my hand.
Sena: “ I am saying that your mother met your father when she was still a
young girl working at a hotel as a housekeeper. My brother saw her and
took advantage of her leaving her pregnant with you. He disappeared for
8 years and came back and your mother had your brother Sanele.”
Me: “ What exactly are you trying to say?” I was getting teary and I was
also breathing fast. This other lady stood up and got me sugared water
and I drank. I finally managed to calm down.
Sena: “ I am sorry for putting you in such a position but my father is very
sick. He would really like to meet you. He doesn’t have any much time
left”
Me: “ Could you stop talking in riddles and tell me what is going on?”
Lady: “ I am sorry for my rudeness but let me introduce myself. My name
is Sihle Dlamini; born Sihle Zulu and I believe we are cousins”
Me: “ Cousins?” she nodded.
Sihle: “ My uncle; the one is the king now Busani Mngomezulu is your
father. Like mom said he took advantage of your mother and told her if
she had you he will kill her. That is why she never talks about him
because she loves you guys and doesn’t want you pulled into this life”
Me: “ So you’re saying that my father doesn’t want me?” Sena nodded.
Sena: “ But we want you baby. We want to get you know you and…’
Before she could finish I heard a very painful kick on my tummy. I held on
to it until it calmed down.
Sihle: “ Are you okay?” she asked rubbing my back.
Me: “ Yes just that he kicked harder than usual. I need to go to the
bathroom..” I stood up and as I stood my water broke. It was too early. I
was only due in 3 weeks.
Sihle: “ Your water just broke” I wasn’t feeling any pain but I needed to
get to the hospital Asap.
Sena: “ Who can I call?”
Me: “ Please call Simo?” I was now starting to sweat. The people in the
restaurant were looking at me. Some taking pictures.
Sena: “ He is not answering” I shook my head no.
Me: “ Call Xoli” she dialled and waited but she also didn’t answer. I told
her to call Nqoba and it was the same response. I was sweating and I felt
the contractions come I screamed.
Sena: “ Please help us get her to the car” some waitress guy came and
carried me to the car. I was now screaming.
Sena: “ Who else can I call?” she was panicking and Sihle was driving.
Me: “ NQUBEKO! CALL NQUBEKO!!!”
Nqubeko
Life has been hard since mom died. I had no one but my brother but he
didn’t understand what i was going through. Let me take you back to the
Carol issue. When i found her screwing my father i was devastated
because i really liked her. I know i said to Nokwazi that i will propose to
Carol but that was just to rattle her. I hadn’t been with Carol for a while;
like as in sleep with her. I only slept with her that day at the office. After
that she told me she is pregnant. When i saw her with my dad i just knew
that he was the father.
Losing Nokwazi was aa bitter pill to swallow; very bitter. I wasn’t even
that concentrated at work. I was losing weight and i was just lost. I
wanted her in my arms. It’s been months of me searching for her and i
really couldn’t find her.
So today i have an important meeting that i had to attend. I woke up and
took a shower. Every morning i’d wake up and i always wished that she
was here with me. Waking up next to me. So i showered and got
dressed. I went downstairs and had my breakfast. I moved back to my
place. I couldn’t stay at my parent’s house because dad was playing
happy family with dad.
I stayed with Carol and proposed to her because i didn’t want mom
finding out about her and dad but it turns out mom knew long ago; before
me. So when we tried to cut ties with her she already knew some secrets
that dad told her when he was drunk. He regrets it every single day that
is why he caters to Carol.
I haven’t had time to read the letter. I was afraid of what i might find.
Nqoba is getting married in 2 months. I really can’t believe it. My meeting
was at 12h00 so i decided to catch up on my sports news.
Just as i say down my phone rang and it was an unknown number. I
immediately answered. As soon as i did i heard a scream in the back
ground.
Me: “ Nqubeko hello”
Caller: “ Hello my boy. You are speaking to Senamile Zulu. I am with
Nokwazi here and she...” i sprung up to my feet. I took my wallet and
keys.
Me: “ Where are you?” i heard Nokwazi scream again and it pierced in
my soul.
Sena: “ We are in R Bay. Come quickly. She is about to give birth” she
hung up leaving me shocked and frozen on spot. Kwazi is pregnant. I
quickly regain my senses and ran to my car. I started the car and called
Nqoba. I kept calling and calling. After some time he answered and he
sounded breathless.
Nqoba: “ You are interrupting me and my fiancé” he chuckled.
Me: “ I found her. I found Nokwazi.” I heard shuffling sounds and Xoli
asking Nqoba what’s going on.
Nqoba: “ How; where?”
Me: “ A woman called me and Nokwazi is in labour. She is in R Bay. I am
already on my way. So follow me already” i hung up and sped to where
she was.
I was very confused and when i counted it meant that the baby was mine.
I didn’t even have the right to be angry because i treated her like shit. I
will spend the rest of my life apologising. Had i told her what is going on
she would be here. We would be together and i would have been there
throughout her pregnancy.
I can imagine how she felt being all alone with people you don’t know. I
finally arrived and i made a call to the number.
Sena: “ Nqubeko where are you. She is very close”
Me: “ I need the name of the hospital” i was breathing hard.
Sena: “ The one in the city. It’s the only one” i heard Kwazi scream again
and i just went crazy. She hung up and i asked around for the hospital.
Turns out i was 5 minutes away.
I finally got there and i rushed in. I went to reception and they directed
me. I got to the labour ward and i immediately found her. She was with 2
ladies. When she saw me her face changed. I don’t know she hated me
maybe.
Kwazi: “ You came” she whispered. I went to her and kissed her sweaty
forehead.
Me: “ Of course i came. I had to come.” She nodded and held on to my
hand. She was squeezing the hell out of my hand. Just then a female Dr
walked in with gloves in her hands. They spread Nokwazi’s legs and i
nearly ran buy she pulled me to her.
Kwazi: “ You are going to stay asshole. You did this to me. You mother
fucker” the lady with the afro chuckled.
Dr: “ Okay we are ready. Miss Kheswa on the count of 3 i’m going to
need you to push for me okay?” she nodded blowing her breath.
Kwazi: “ I will do anything you want me to do. Just get the baby out of my
tummy”
Dr: “ Okay. One two three push”
Nokwazi pushed and pushed. It really was a struggle because she was at
it for 5 minutes before we saw any progress.
Dr: “ Okay i need one big push. I can see the head” she held on to my
hand and pushed screaming. I felt as if my bones were breaking.
Dr: “ That’s good. One more big push Kwazi” She pushed harder then
before and then the baby came out. We were welcomed by this tiny cry.
Dr: “ It’s a boy” Nokwazi smiled faintly and passed out.
Me: “ Dr she passed out” she came to my side and felt her pulse.
Dr: “ I will ask the nurses to clean her up and take her to her ward. For
now they are cleaning your son and you will see him shortly.
I stepped away from the bed and waited. I didn’t even acknowledge these
ladies that were with her. I was actually shocked. I found Nokwazi and i
also found out that she was pregnant. I am a father. The nurse came and
gave me the baby. He was covered in green hospital towels.
Nurse: “ He doesn’t have any clothes.”
Lady: “ I will go buy them” said the lady in an afro and she walked out.
Nurse: “ You want to hold him?” i nodded with my blurry eyes. She gave
him to me and i felt so emotional. That moment i just fell in love with this
boy. I just hope his mother forgives me. Lord knows how much i hurt her.
I will do anything and i mean anything even if it means telling her the truth
about everything.
Nokwazi
I woke up later with a very sore body. I looked around the ward and my
eyes landed on Nqubeko. He was crouching down by the baby cot; his
back facing me. He was making baby noises and i couldn’t help but
giggle. He quickly turned and looked at me frowning. He looked back at
the baby before kissing him and he stood up. He walked to me and took
a seat. We both fell into this awkward silence. Nqubeko cleared his throat
and i looked at him.
Nqubeko: “ I deserve me not knowing that you were pregnant. I deserve
not being there when he first kicked. Hell i don’t deserve to be here but
you are still the kind hearted woman i know” i lifted up my hand.
Me: “ Nqubeko i...” he stopped me.
Nqubeko: “ Can i just get this off my chest before you can say anything?”
i nodded.
Nqubeko: “ I hurt you. I hurt you so badly and i am sorry. I don’t even
have an excuse but allow me to tell you what happened and why things
turned out that way”
He stood up and walked to the window. He started telling me everything
not leaving a thing out. The way my emotions were playing with me. I
was sad and angry. I would cry but he kept talking until he was done. He
turned around and looked at me.
Nqubeko: “ I should have told you the truth. I know it was selfish of me to
do that but a lot of things were going through my mind. I couldn’t afford to
make a mistake but my biggest mistake was letting you go. I don’t
deserve your forgiveness but you knowing the truth makes me feel
better” his eyes were red from all the crying.
Me: “ So you’re saying that Carol knows all this, how did she find out?”
Nqubeko: “ She gave birth a few weeks ago by the way. She found out
when dad got drunk and slept with her. Their pillow talk was of that his
telling her everything” my blood started to boil.
Me: “You have selfish parents” he looked at me with his wide eyes.
Me: “ Seriously; they are selfish. How could they burden you with such?
It’s not your fight yet you took the fall for both of them. Now you are left
with this mess. Who protects you? Who is there for you?” his head hung
and he breathed out hard. I wanted to get out of bed and hold him but i
held myself.
Nqubeko: “ I have no one. It’s all my fault. I..” i interrupted him.
Me: “ It’s your selfish parents fault. What’s in the letter?”
Nqubeko: “ Leverage. I haven’t even read it. I was looking for you all
these months” i sighed.
Me: “ You even look like a grandpa. How have you been?” he looked at
me and chuckled.
Nqubeko: “ I’ll be alright. At least i know where you are and i will come
visit our son. Would you like to see him? We have been so consumed by
my problems you haven’t even met champ. He is adorable” he said
walking to his cot. He took him out and he cried. I smiled. Nqubeko had
this smile on his face; i have never seen it before. He walked to me with
the baby and he gave him to me.
Nqubeko: “ Careful with his head” i looked at him and he raised up his
hands.
Me: “ Chill daddy of the year” he chuckled.
I then looked at this beautiful tiny soul in my hands. He looked so much
like Nqubeko it was freaky. I looked at him and he grinned.
Nqubeko: “ I know. He looks like daddy” he winked.
I looked at my boy once more. He had so much hair no wonder i always
had heart burn. I kissed his tiny lips and he pouted. He even had
Nqubeko’s complexion: Yellow Bone. He really loomed coloured. Just as i
was having a moment with my son the door bursts open and in came
Nqoba and Xoli. Nqoba rushed to bed and kisses my cheeks.
Nqoba: “ Oh my god we have been looking for you! Don’t ever do that to
us. My brother even aged a bit” i wanted to laugh i really do but it was
awkward because of what Nqubeko told me. I looked at Nqubeko and he
mouthed “ Relax” i let out a breath before i giggled.
Me: “ I wanted to breath a different air” all this time Xoli was standing afar
and she was crying. I gave the baby to Nqoba and opened my arms to
Xoli. She was shaking her head and crying.
Me: “ Come here” Xoli is such a cry baby. She ran and threw herself in
my arms;ouch. The brothers looked at us then back to the baby.
Xoli: “ How could you leave like that? Aren’t we supposed to be sisters?”
she cried and i wiped her tears before cupping her face.
Me: “ I couldn’t stay. Don’t ask me why but i just couldn’t stay” she
nodded and i hugged her again. Nqubeko took his son and marched to
me.
Nqubeko: “ Baby we haven’t given him a name”
Nqoba: “ baby?” Nqubeko’s cheeks heated clearly embarrassed.
Me: “ Leave my baby daddy alone” we all laughed.
Me: “ What would you like to name him?”
Nqubeko: “ How about Siphesihle Austin” i liked the Siphesihle one but i
wasn’t sure about the Austin.
Me: “ Does he really need the 2nd name?” Nqubeko smiled shyly. He
really liked the Austin.
Nqubeko: “ Well if you don’t like it it’s fine” he chuckled nervously.
Me: “ Siphesihle Clayton Kheswa” he lifted his head beaming.
Nqubeko: “ I love it!” he kissed his son and Sphe cried. The nurse got it.
Nurse: “ Time to eat. Time for breast feeding mommy” she smiled.
I took out my boob getting ready to feed him. The nurse showed me how
and Sphe started sucking. He was sucking for dear life and it was very
painful. Conversation was flowing but Nqubeko just zoned out looking at
me breast feed his son.
Nqoba: “ I am going to the canteen. Does anyone need anything?” i
shook my head no.
Xoli: “ I’m coming with you” they left the room and it was just me; Sphe
and Nqubeko.
Nqubeko: “ Could you please keep what i told you to yourself; you can’t
even tell Xoli”
Me: “ I promise i won’t tell anyone but you need to get things off your
chest.” He shook his head no.
Nqubeko: “ I’ll be fine. As long as this stays between us i’ll be okay” i
looked at this selfless man and felt sorry for him. To carry such a burden
because of selfish parents. Xoli and Nqoba came back. We had a snack
and later they left.
Me: “ Can i talk to you about something?” he was looking at his son.
Nqubeko: “ Yes. We can talk” he wasn’t even paying attention to me.
Me: “ NQUBEKO!!” i shouted and he jumped causing me to laugh.
Me: “ Eyes over here” he looked at Sphe.
Nqubeko: “ Mommy is jealous already” he kissed him and walked to me.
Me: “ Can you get my mom for me? I really need to see her” he nodded.
Nqubeko: “ Okay. I will get on it right away. Simo called...” he walked
towards the window.
Me: “ Nqubeko it’s not what you think” he smiled.
Nqubeko: “ You don’t owe me any explanations. I hurt you so you are
allowed to move on. It’s your life and...”
Me: “ Nqubeko..” he didn’t hear me instead he continued talking.
Nqubeko: “ I mean you are beautiful; smart sexy. Any guy would be lucky
to have you”
Me: “ Nqubeko...” i called him again but did he answer? Nope.
Nqubeko: “ I messed up. I should be happy for you. I mean i will be
happy for you.”
Me: “ NQUBEKO!” i shouted yet again and he kept quiet.
Me: “ Thank you. Simo is not my boyfriend. He has been helping me with
everything and he is the one who helped me hide” i sighed.
Me: “ He is not my man. Nqubeko; Simo is gay” he looked at me his eyes
wide and what he did next was very unexpected. He did the gwara
gwara.
After that victory dance that Nqubeko did i couldn’t stop laughing. I don’t
know what’s going on between us and i wasn’t going to bring it up until he
does. I now understand why he had done those things he did but when
he told me he loves me not so long ago i felt like flying. I wasn’t going to
give in just yet; yes i understand his reasons but had to make him sweat
a little.
He was in love with Siphe it wasn’t even funny. The door opened and my
mom got in followed by Sanele. My heart nearly stopped. I know i asked
Nqubeko to call mom but i wasn’t ready to face her yet. As soon as she
saw me she rushed to me and hugged me. She just cried. All this while
Sanele was standing by the door biting on his hands.
Nqubeko wasn’t even paying attention to us. He was rocking his son.
After crying and hugging me ; kissing me all over my face mom finally
calmed down.
Mom: “ I am so glad you’re okay. I thought i lost you forever” she said
wiping her tears.
Me: “ I am sorry mom. I didn’t know what else to do plus i had
disappointed you”
Mom: “ Nokwazi you are 23 years old; you have a place of your own. I
had you when i was 19. I had no one but you; you have me. You chose to
run away. Why?” i looked down shaking my head.
Me: “ I was ashamed mom plus i thought Nqubeko didn’t want anything to
do with me and...” Nqubeko cleared his throat so much that he coughed. I
gave him a look and after that he walked to Siphe’s bed and placed him
in it.
Nqubeko: “ I’ll be outside. Call me if you need me” he walked out
pushing Sanele out with him and mom sighed.
Mom: “ At least he took Sane out of here. Poor boy has been devastated.
He hasn’t said a thing since we left home”
Me: “ I’m really sorry mom. I...”she put up her hand and walked to the
baby cot. She looked at Siphe and took him.
Mom: “ He looks just like his yellow bone father” i chuckled. She cuddled
him and went to sit again.
Me: “ I didn’t know what to do plus mom we are trying to put Sanele
through school and then here i am pregnant with a baby that i didn’t even
know if his father would want him. I am sorry mom”
Mom: “ Your sorries are just not enough. Didn’t i raise you to always talk
to me when something is troubling you?”
Me: “ You did mom and...” she raised up her hand to stop me from
talking.
Mom: “ I am still talking. You will shut your pap eating hole and listen to
what i have to say.” I quickly nodded while she looked at Siphe and
kissed his forehead.
Mom: “ Having you was unplanned but i told myself that i would never let
anyone hurt you. Your brother as well. I know you didn’t get everything
you wanted when you were young but i did try my best with you. For you
to run away like that...” she said shaking her head and her eyes were
glossy with tears.
Mom: “ I am disappointed in you. Not because you fell pregnant; hell you
could have gotten pregnant by an old men i don’t care but the fact that
you ran. You ran like i am a monster who was going to shout and throw
you out?” she was now crying and i felt very bad.
Me: “ I am so sorry mom. I really am” she shook her head laughing.
Mom: “ You should be glad this yellow child is handsome. I would have
slapped you back to virginity” i held my mouth and giggled.
After that we laughed and talked about things. How things have been and
how we missed each other.
Mom: “ Thank you for the money you sent every month. It helped a whole
lot.”
Me: “ I am just glad that Sma paid me still. I don’t know what i would have
done but Simo has been helping me a lot.” She gave me a look.
Mom: “ Hmmm Simo now” i laughed.
Me: “ Mom Simo is my gay friend. He is my boss’s very gay son. Don’t
worry mom. Nqubeko is the one i love. Not sure if he feels the same”
mom gave me a smile.
Mom: “ If only you knew. That man searched high and low for you. He
came to my house EVERYDAY asking the very same question since you
have been gone”
Me: “ Really?” i beamed and mom chuckled.
Mom: “ Look at you bitch clit dancing like car wipes” i laughed very loudly
but was interrupted by the rough opening of the door and in came this
handsome tall old man with 2 other buff guys behind him.
Mom: “ Busani” mom whispered and she looked really scared.
Busani: “ So it’s true. You really did give birth to your bastards”
Me: “ Excuse me what?” i interrupted but he gave me a scary look.
Busani: “ Was i talking to you?”
Me: “ Who are you calling a bastard?”
Mom: “ Nokwazi please. I will handle this” mom was shaking and this
man was walking to her slowly. She had my son is her arms and she
looked like she was about to drop him.
Me: “ Mom give me Siphe” she gave me Siphe and turned to this guy
swallowing hard.
Busani: “ I told you. Londiwe i told you that i don’t want kids. I told you to
kill them but you went and had them anyways. What the fuck is wrong
with you?” he shouted and i jumped.
Mom: “ I have never asked you for shit so please don’t come here telling
me crap about MY children”
Busani: “ Children?”
Mom: “ Yes. It’s Nokwazi and Sanele. You fucked and left me. TWICE. I
was young yet you took advantage of me.”
Busani: “ You wanted me just as i wanted you.”
Mom: “ I was 18. You were 26! You should have fucking known better!”
she was yelling and cussing. To be honest i have never heard mom cuss.
Busani: “ You were stupid and naive virgin. Did you think i would love
you? Me ; a Prince love you? A commoner?” mom marched to him.
Mom: “ I don’t give a shit who you were or are right now. You stay the
fuck away from my kids” he was about to answer when the door opened
and Nqubeko walked in.
Nqubeko: “ What’s going on in here? You guys we could hear you from
down the hall?”
Busani: “ And you are? Can’t you see we are talking?”
Nqubeko: “ Could you keep it down please?”
Busani: “ Do you know who i am? Boy you don’t get to tell me what to
do!” he shouted and pointed his index finger at Nqubeko. Nqubeko just
chuckled and walked towards me with Sanele right behind him.
Nqubeko: “ I don’t give a shit who you are. You watch how you talk in
front of my family.”
Busani: “ You don’t get to talk to me like that. I can...”
Nqubeko: “ I said i don’t care who you are. This is my family. All of them.
Watch how you talk or else there is the door behind you” Busani’s eyes
widened in shock while mom had that satisfied smile on her face. I was
also shocked and Sanele had a huge grin on his face. Nqubeko on the
other hand took his son from me and kissed him. This Busani guy looked
at Nqubeko clearly pissed. He clicked his tongue and stormed out.
To say i was stunned was an understatement i was beyond shocked and
Nqubeko was so chilled looking at his son. Mom giggled and i gave her a
look.
Mom: “ That man is dangerous. He could have you killed”
Nqubeko: “ Yeah yeah. I also have my connections so i will sort him out if
i have to. Don’t care if he is King. If he doesn’t show respect he must just
stay far away” he kissed Siphe’s forehead. Sanele cleared his throat.
Sanele: “ Errrr bhut Nqubeko could you teach...teach me that?” he gently
placed Siphe on his bed and turned to Sanele.
Nqubeko: “ Teach you what?”
Sanele: “ To stand up for myself like that and...” Nqubeko interrupted him.
Nqubeko: “ You and me are linked for life. Stick with me” the fist bumped
and laughed. Mom just smiled shaking hiss head.
Mom: “ Don’t you want to rest a bit baby? We’re just going to get coffee,
me and Sanele.”
Sanele: “ Mom i just came from...” she interrupted him.
Mom: “ I did not ask you. When i come back; you Nqubeko have a lot of
explaining to do. You might have saved the day by fixing Busani but you
and i are still going to talk” mom walked out followed by Sanele.
Nqubeko came and sat on a chair next the bed. He took my hand and
placed a kiss on the back of it sending chills down my spine. I looked at
out hands and mine seemed so dark against his.
Nqubeko: “ Look at me” he said in a low deep voice i almost didn’t hear
him. I looked at him ad damn damn damn. Nqubeko keeps getting cuter.
He blinked a couple of times before he looked down at our hands and
back to my eyes again. Let me tell you about his light grey eyes with his
eyebrows; pink lips and nicely trimmed beard.
Nqubeko: “ I can never apologise enough to you and i will spend the rest
of my life doing so. I meant it when i said i love you and i will wait for you
Nokwazi. I will wait until you are ready to forgive me. “
I looked at him smiling. He looked really nervous.
Nqubeko: “ I’m pouring out my heart to you and you find that amusing” i
laughed while he chuckled.
Me: “ I hear you Nqubeko. It’s too soon to say but give me time to
process all of this okay?” he kissed my hand again.
Nqubeko: “ That’s all i ask for my love. I love you” he stood up and placed
a long baby kiss on my lips.
Me: “ I love you too” i replied when he pulled back. He looked shocked.
Nqubeko: “ Don’t worry. I won’t rush you to anything. As long as you love
me” he smiled.
The door opened yet again and Sihle got in with her mother. I rolled my
eyes. Why do people keep invading my space so much today. Sihle
walked to where Siphe was and she was about to pick Siphe out when
Nqubeko cleared his throat. We all turned and looked at him.
Nqubeko: “ Please wash and sanitise your hands before touching my
son. Babe; i’ll go join your mom outside” he kissed my lips again before
he left. Sena looked at him until he walked out before she whistled. I
wanted to laugh but i was pissed at the stunt they pulled.
Sihle: “ Baby daddy is bitter” she didn’t even pick him up. She looked at
him and came to stand next to her mother.
Me: “ He should be bitter after that visit we got from Busani Mngomezulu”
both their eyes widened and they turned to look at each other.
Sena: “ How did he know?!”
Sihle: “ Grandpa probably asked him. You know how he can’t zip it these
days”
Me: “ Please tell him to stay away. He called my brother and i bastards”
Sena exclaimed.
Sihle: “ Mom tell your brother to stay away before i deal with him” i raised
up my hands.
Me: “ I don’t even want to hear it. I was fine without you guys. You should
just leave me alone. I am 23 years old. My mom has been taking care of
me and my brother all these years so you can go”
Sihle: “ But we..i...” i cut her off.
Me: “ No; you have done enough. Tell your grandfather i can’t come see
him. We can’t come see him. I don’t want to cause trouble and i don’t like
putting my family in danger.”
Sena: “ I will talk to my brother. Please just see my dad this once. Please”
i shook my head no.
Me: “ You should have seen how terrified my mom was. If anything i am
loyal to my mother till the end so no thanks. It was nice meeting you guys
but please leave” Sihle looked pissed but i really didn’t care.
Sena: “ Nokwazi we...” Sihle cut her off.
Sihle: “ Mom leave it. Let’s go” she took her mom’s hand and walked out.
I let out a breath that i did not know i was holding in. As in queue mom;
Sanele and Nqubeko came back. He was carrying a spur paper bag.
Mom: “ Baby we have to leave now. We are going to see you tomorrow” i
suddenly felt sad.
Me: “ Do you guys have to leave?”
Sanele: “ We’ll be back sis. Plus bhut Nqubeko said he...” Nqubeko
nudged him and he kept quiet. Mon laughed.
Nqubeko: “ Dr said he will discharge you tomorrow.” I smiled.
Mom: “ Yes and we can talk about damages.” My eyes shot up. Nqubeko
just looked at the floor. He took out his hands from his pockets.
Nqubeko: “ Yes Miss Kheswa” he looked so shy hehe i wanted to laugh.
Mom: “ Yes i want 8 cows” i shot up from bed. Nqubeko didn’t seem
fazed.
Me: “ Mom that’s too much!”
Mom: “ What do you know about damages?! You Nqubeko; i want those
8 cows. 3 for her virginity and 5 for Siphesihle.” She headed towards the
door.
Nqubeko: “ Yes mah. I will talk to my uncles.”
Mom: “ Oh that amounts to R112 000. I would like that in cash please.
Bye kids” Yoooh my mom
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